Woohoo! On my way to Ist or...

...what a long, strange trip it's been.

Tripolina and I made it to JFK tonight and we are now pulling out of the gate! Hooray! I can't wait! Clips for docu to follow.

Is Bullwinkle gonna be pissed or...

...how to get the express breakfast.

The sun didn't break over the Orienta horizon yet. I tossed on a windbraker as I walked the yard first and then came back to let out good old Mr. Zazoo this morning. I went in to prepare ilili's food, then serve it while the coffee was brewing and the milk was warming in the micro. Ah, nice, hot, magnificent smelling coffee, first thing!

So I brought the coffee upstairs to the bath and was just about to take a sip when I glanced out the window to see Zazoo. I just like to look at him and admire his beauty.

But he wasn't near the humongous oak. I looked to the end of the yard. No Zazoo. Damn, dis he jump the brick wall this early? I sucked a long sip but didnt taste it and ran back down the stairs. I looked out the den window to see him sitting in an unnatural spot for him. His head was in an awkward position.
"Dammit!" he has something. I barked out orders to the sleeping Jewel and he followed me into the yard. He got the shovel and I turned on the hose. Zaz had a grey squirrel that he wasn't about to give it up easily. We chased him with the poor squirrel dangling out of his mouth, back to the house where the hose would reach him. I put my thumb on the nozzle to make the stream forceful and let him have it until he surrendered. He finally relented.

I told the Jewel to shovel up Rocky J. While I washed off Zaz's beard, ears and paws. Rocky joined the Wabbit from earlier this week apparently because the Jewel didn't look into the bin but said it reeked. the bin boys are gonna love me! Note to self: Big fat envelope.

Another note ro self: figure out how/why these animals must come into our garden when they know the "King of the Jungle" is on patrol. This thought might keep me busy on the long flight to Istanbul. Or will it? You be the judge.

On the midnight train to Georgia or...I'm really on my way back to Istanbul!!!

I'm less than 48 hours away from touchdown in Old Stamboul.  Hooray!  Can't wait to get back.  I miss the diverse culture, the vibrancy of an electric, magical city, the delicious food and, of course, the hot men.

Aside from their physical beauty, they have an inner beauty, a glow I just fail to see in the American men. I believe it's due to the fact that they sold out to capitalism.  They're just into life for the money; they can't enjoy anything. Miserable sorts. And they eat crap. Anyway..

Tripolina's probably going to join me and we'll start the rough out for the documentary as I schlep through my adopted city and you'll get to see it through my eyes.  Not the top 10 tourist spots that every idiot puts on their show, but the real Istanbul.

And I can't wait to see all my friends; cherished ones, business ones, casual acquaintances, and all the new friends I'll make.  And my FHBHDKIY :)

Allah Akbar.

the next time Zazoo bags a critter...

Are these varmints as dumb as they look or...

...are they exacting their revenge appropriately?

Case in point: Mr. Zazoo has killed copious amounts of non-domesticated critters this season in Orienta. He got another jack rabbit last night.

It had rained heavily all day. I asked the Jewel to contact Noah for the ark blueprints. He said the Nazi's got his Granddad Noah, so there wouldn't be any plans.

It let up around dinnertime, so I fed and marched Zaz. Good thing I wore me Wellies. We waded through streams that were once sidewalks. So it wasn't raining when we returned to the cottage and I left him in the garden. I went about some business in the house and glanced up to see what he doing at dusk. Usually he sits like the Spinx on his elbows in the hopes of a stupid squirrel or skunk walking into his domain. He was jumping around in the way that I knew meant trouble. He had something!

I ran out to see it was another big ol' jack rabbit and he wouldn't drop it. I grabbed the garden hose, put my thumb over the nozzle and let him have it. Mostly to wash his face and ears off and partly to force him to give up the poor dead bunny.

Worked like a charm and trotted him in.

I called Nazi Karl with a K, he promptly drove in the again pissing rain to drop said bunny in his final resting place. (the bin.)

Ok, so what's their revenge? Zazoo had tapeworms a couple of weeks ago and the vet said it was either from flea infestation or varmints. No sign of fleas. You do the math. So, who's the dumb one?

ilili's first book.

I'm ilili's Mama, too.  I just created her first photo book.

Click here to view this photo book larger

Zazoo made the local news or...

...do you actually have to bite someone that smells like a French whore in the subway to get notoriety?

I showed the house Sunday. The real estate agent didn't listen to her client. Apparently he said "no stairs" because his ancient dad couldn't climb them. There are 4 sets altogether here. I was obviously annoyed that she wasted my time. I told them to wait in the entry hall while I collared Zaz and held him way into the garden but the man exclaimed,"we love dogs. No need.".

Against my better judgment, I didn't restrain him. When the man walked out, Zaz and silly ilili greeted him with tails a wagging. But when the old biddy came out he was pissed and barked. And barked. She must have tensed up and Zaz couldn't get a sense of what she was about because she reeked and nipped at her. I tried to get between them but the agent wasn't paying attention to me as I barked out commands. Good ol' Zaz was just doing his job trying to protect me from what he perceived as a mortal threat. Good doggy!

So the moral of the story is this: ladies, if you're brave enough to visit, please don't smell like a cheap French whore in the subway.

PS. Black Hawk's owner is more concerned that Zazoo will get cooties from her!

http://larchmont.patch.com/articles/police-blotter-family-feud-in-grocery-store-parking-lot-vengeful-dog-and-disappointed-burglers

Pricker bushes strike again or...

...the reoccurring nightmare breathes again.

I told Dominick, my Papa, Friday night as I cut down pricker bushes that hung into the road from the bush across the street, that I clearly remember the nightmares removing them from Zazoo One all those years ago. He ran free in the Armonk woods and would occasionally, and way to often, return with these damn dried pricker flowers imbedded in his long dark fur. It took hours, sometimes all night to comb them out. Poor thing even had to have them clipped out professionally on a couple of occasions.

So I'd be damned if it happens now and I'm sooo careful with Zazoo Two that I made a pre-emotive strike and obliterated them from in front of the property.

So this morning, within 48 hours, silly ilili snuck under the fence and returned covered in prickers! She must have been stuck in the bush. The poor little girl was covered. Oh boy! Thank God she has fuzz and not a flowing coat. I combed them out and twenty minutes later she was good as new and loved the attention of a thorough combing. She's such a joy: so lovely, so light of heart and gay. What a blessing to have these wonderful dogs in my life!

Now ro go back out with shears and hunt down the nasty bush.

Rabid forest animals attacking domestic pets or...

...are Mr. Zazoo and miss ilili safe in these here burbs?

Damn, child, I'm so glad when Zaz had the ah, altercation with the skunks, the trapper told me to get him to the good Dr. Vierra for a rabies booster.

I didn't actually see if Zaz pounced on them or they came up behind him and attacked him! Mercy.

Here's the story so please read if you're in the 'burbs. http://larchmont.patch.com/articles/westchester-county-health-department-issues-rabies-alert

Life in a small town or...

...thank God it's only this sort of thing.

From this morning's police blotter:

7:55 a.m. – A homeowner on Orienta Avenue came outside to find a strange man curled up sleeping on his porch. Police arrived to take the man home to his own bed.


And we wonder why our taxes are preposterous?

3:20 p.m. – A snapping turtle who lost it’s way was discovered on a boat ramp at Harbor Island Park. Although a local trapper was unable to transport the animal, police kept watch until the turtle eventually found it’s way back into the water.

Who said we're having a recession or depression?

8:01 p.m. – A person driving a 2008 Land Rover and backing out of a spot in front of 322 Mamaroneck Ave., struck a 2006 Porsche that was stuck in traffic. The person driving the Land Rover left the scene; there were no injuries.

Well, perhaps we are. Older model vehicles.

And what about this: 6:05 p.m. – An ambulance driver struck a stone wall on Greacen Point Road when he made a sharp right turn out of a driveway. The right side of the ambulance and a side mirror were damaged.

This road near me has a home on the Market for 13 million usd. No joke.

http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS-usYriNfBayuLYxYBKEIGCXSoVDB9mBFgHReVyIb3lm1um1M9

Miss ilili in her new schmatah or...

...am I trying to gild the lily?

Miss ILILI

Lunch at the Delamar or..

...Tripolina and I have a good laugh on our way to a summertime waterside luncheon.  Check out the sign on the dumpster. If you don't get it, kindly ask. 

The atmosphere was lovely on a sunny summer day as we sat on the deck overlooking the bay with all the waspy lovelies in posh Greenwich, CT.  A beautiful menu was presented but I had to try a burger. Look at pic and you'll see why. Absolutely delicious. Trip's lobster salad sandwich, pictured in the background, was great too.  Ah , lovely to live in Westchestah!

Rockin' at the Ritz or...

...how much of this bloody hurricane and the aftermath must I be forced to watch on the telly 'till I crack?

I'm sure by now you've been inundated with the coverage. It was as bad as it was portrayed, in my opinion, and I don't think the authorities or the media hyped it. Dozens of people are dead and there's widespread flooding and devastation in many states.

I saw a mess coming early last week so I made plans to take the Afghans to high ground with generators. Where else but the local Ritz Carlton? Decadent you might think, but they're one of the few hotels in these burbs that accommodates four-legged guests under 50 pounds. Zazoo just passed the weight limit but no one asked. It was crazy-frenetic when we arrived noontime Saturday. It had rained earlier and it was hot and humid when a friend loaded up her car. Zaz, ilili in her crate, several milk crates with dog food and supplies, my wellies and slicker a duffle of my personals and a bag of laptop, iPad, wires and cables all on a trolly, sat in the crowded lobby as I tried to check in. Ilili screamed in monkey voice as I moved away from her. Reception was quick, thanks to ilili, and soon we were all in a lovely room...But it's still a room, not a house.

I was mesmerized by the coverage and saddened by the early reports of devastation but slept an hour or so before dawn on Sunday to anticipate Irene touching down at Coney Island at 9 AM. Well, she did, right on schedule. I went down to the lobby a few times to watch the winds blow and talk to door personnel. No other guests were around. Did they not care? How could one sleep in during an epic storm? The wind ripped past the porte cochere and whistled through the doors when closed. I didn't see any debris or people flying by; just incredible sideways rain that pounded the air.

Exhausted as I was, I had to experience it live. Incredible! It's hard to put into words...the swirl of the wind moving the rain. The rain pelting sideways. The young trees near the hotel not swaying but being forcibly pushed to breaking point as their tops went horizontal. I didn't dare venture out. Even when the rain let up a bit. Some brave retriever owners, men, of course, braved the elements with a dumb look, a shrug, and, "he has to go." The hell he does. I brought wee wee pads. "Common sense ain't so common," as the old Jewish man once said.

When it got down to a dull roar I took Mr. Zazoo out for a round the block. That didn't happen. The winds were still too strong, so he piddled in front of the building on their precious little flowers. Oh, well. He wanted to be brave but the wind pushed us back.

Here are some sea grass that usually point to the heavens.  

we tried again a bit later.  I was a little scared as we turned a bend and I felt my feet trying to move forward, but I wasn't moving.  Either was he as I held his collar so we would stay together if one of us was swept away.  I was that frightened.  Now I laugh about it, but it was scary.